My friend’s dad told me about how he grew up in an area where he felt racism. He is Chinese, Hawaiian, and Caucasian. He said the Hawaiians would not accept him because he wasn’t full blood, nor would the Chinese, and he felt he couldn’t fit in with the Caucasians because his skin was too dark and his black. He said that he was always confused and wasn’t sure if he should even learn traditions. I asked him if he spoke to his parents about it but he said they weren’t much comfort and he often was alone. To this day her dad is pretty closed up emotionally. He usually takes the first impression as the only one, and if he so much as feels that someone doesn’t like him he does all he can to stay away from them. He even is confused for how he feels about his grandson being interracial. So as you can see, although the past is in the very far past, he still holds tightly to it and how it made him feel. I cannot leave any information as a resource for this because he is highly personal and doesn’t want anyone to know he feels this way.
Children in Iraq have high levels of post-traumatic stress disorder. It can be expected due to the war we are currently in and the war they have been in for years upon years. After the Gulf War “94 children in Iraq were interviewed at 6 months, 1 year, and 2 years after the war” only to find out that the same level of stress was present all three times. At the two year interview the stress had gone just a little bit, but it was still very high. I couldn’t imagine trying to cope with what they have seen. As far as I know nothing is being done o minimize the stress except for what little hope their parents and American soldiers bring to them.
I was giving a driving test one time to a young man from Saudi Arabia. When I asked him about how he felt about the way Americans perceived the Middle East, he said calmly that we overreact. I said so you don’t have car bombs explode all the time and the streets are safe to walk down? He said that yes they have regular bombings but that it wasn’t a big deal. I was amazed to find that he felt these things were normal. He told me about the first explosion he saw, but spoke of it as we would speak of going to Disney World. He said the thing he fears most in America is our lack of knowledge. He said we rely too much from the media to form our opinions for us. True.
Dyregrov, A., Gjestad, R., Raundalen, M. (2002). Children Exposed to Warfare: A Longitudinal Study. Journal of Traumatic Stress, Vol. 15, No. 1. Pgs. 59-68. Retrieved from http://www.springerlink.com/content/g27k05pu38546394/
Hi Tina,
ReplyDeleteOne of my relatives is bi-racial and I can empathize with how your friend felt growing up. My relative did not feel as if she "fit in" and that lead to years and years of turmoil in her life. You sound like a very good friend to offer resources to the family, don't give up as you may be planting a seed now which may grow into the family reaching out for help later.
The information you gave on children in Iraq is heartbreaking, like you I couldn't imagine what horrific things they may have witnessed.
Reading about the stresses others deal with in their lives, humbles me and not only makes me more appreciate of what I have, but fuels my desire to help others.
Thank you for your post,
Julie
What a great post. Your information regarding your conversation with a man from Saudi Arabia was fascinating. I have traveled all over the world and often I get into conversation about America's lack on knowledge on the rest of the world. I can certainly agree with that. I feel like when it comes to our knowledge regarding other cultures and a way of life that a lot of people don't have a clue.
ReplyDeleteAbby
Hi Tina,
ReplyDeleteJust want you to know that your friend’s dad is not alone in this world. I have experienced racism first-hand, more than once. I have walked into a store and had the manager or clerk follow me around the store to make sure that I did not steal anything. I have walked into restaurants and heard racial slurs being muttered by a customer. I try not to pay any attention to people that only have half a brain so I just ignore people that are prejudice against me. It would be nice to just be able to ignore those comments, but it is not that easy to ignore ignorant people. I admit that the issue of prejudice is not as big of an issue as it may have been 40 years ago, but it has not gone away. The only question is this: Is it not that big of an issue because people have learned to be more tolerant or is it because people have learned to hide their prejudice? Thanks for sharing your friend’s dad experience.
Valerie